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February 22, 2007

Short Jokes

Behind_me A man was sailing down a winding mountain road when a car swerved around a curve he was approaching. Its driver, a woman, rolled down her window, stuck her head out, and yelled "Pig!" at him. Thinking fast, the man put his head out and yelled after her "Bitch!" Complimenting himself on thinking fast for once, he tooled around the curve and into a large hog standing in the middle of the road

"This bull mated 50 times last year"

The Farmer And The Lawyer

Q: How many members of a (given demographic group) does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: 'N+1 (where N is a positive whole number)' one to hold the lightbulb and N to behave in a fashion generally associated with a negative stereotype of that group. (From wikipedia blog)

A rich man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of Heaven and said, "Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you - we've looked at your life, and your really didn't do anything particularly good or bad. We're not at all sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?"

The man thought for a moment and replied, "Yeah, once I was driving along in my Ferrari and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of bikers. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of the bikers. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his body and a ring pierced through his nose. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his nose, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or they would have to deal with me!"

"I'm impressed," St. Peter responded, "When did this happen?"
"About two minutes ago," came the reply.

Don't fart in a space suit

"A baby seal walks into a club" and more from the Best Short Joke Mini Contest. More here:
What do you call a fish with no eyes?


Antonin Scalia bobblehead (to see him in action, click his head). Scalia is 19 times as funny as Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg

The George Bush I Should Have Pulled Out T-shirt

(No time to blog anything serious tonight. Sorry)

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I need more readers. Please introduce this blog to everybody you know. Thank you.

February 22, 2007 in Jokes | Permalink


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I'll give you another shout and you're listed in my sidebar. The problem is nobody reads me either. LOL You certainly work hard getting all those links together and deserve a bigger audience, yes you do!

Posted by: Cuidado at Feb 22, 2007 2:20:58 AM

Don't give up! ;)

Posted by: wrongsocks at Feb 22, 2007 4:59:16 AM

I always mention U to my friends.... but I don't think they get thar daily dose of brain medication

Posted by: ramtrax_2k2 at Feb 22, 2007 5:36:06 AM

I always mention U to my friends.... but I don't think they get thar daily dose of brain medication

Posted by: ramtrax_2k2 at Feb 22, 2007 5:36:54 AM

Done deal, but not alot of traffic here, either. For what it's worth, IMHO, your place rocks.

Posted by: Undeniable Liberal at Feb 22, 2007 2:29:01 PM

I forgot on Cre8ive1 but I have four blogs so I put you on the one with the most traffic. Here's the plug: http://justpictureit.shutterchance.com/photoblog/60474.htm

Posted by: Cuidado at Feb 22, 2007 3:15:38 PM

As an avid daily reader I promise that I will tell more people about growabrain.
I love reading stuff here first.
This is like a secret garden, I'm not sure I want any one else to know about you!

You're listed in my very exclusive sidebar.

But I suspect that I need more readers far more than you do. LOL

You deserve them.
I don't.

Posted by: Mike at Feb 22, 2007 3:35:52 PM

You have no idea how hard I pimp this site! Every day, I send a GAB link to someone I know, always noting "As Seen On Grow A Brain" with your URL. I even send follow-up emails making sure the recipient read the link. I can only hope that my friends and family aren't lying to me. I could sneak into their homes and check their History....

Posted by: Hypercoma at Feb 22, 2007 5:39:44 PM

No problem, I'm happy to share your site.

I'm looking forward to seeing you post some more pictures of the property in New Zealand (I believe that is where it is...)

Posted by: Nickie at Feb 22, 2007 6:04:58 PM

Hanan, why do you need more readers, after over 6 million hits? I mean, the world would be a much better and more interesting and inspiring place if more people read your blog, and .... oh. I guess I know why.

Posted by: Laurie Smashcan at Feb 22, 2007 6:50:47 PM

i bet what hanan wrote about getting more reader is just a joke as it is placing in jokes and funny stuff category.

Posted by: senay at Mar 2, 2007 11:00:31 AM