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December 18, 2005
For every philosopher, there exists an equal and opposite philosopher
Sartre is sitting at a French cafe, revising his draft of Being and Nothingness. He says to the waitress, "I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream." The waitress replies, "I'm sorry, monsieur, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?" Other Philosopher Jokes
This morning I received thrilling news: a joke I wrote more than 20 years ago has been voted the funniest religious joke of all time! (From Steve Michel)
Don't flush, don't flush and Wrong Number. From “Amidst a tangled web”
Jewish Greetings –
A. “Nice to see you again, Hymie.”.
B. “Nu, is this how my friend greets me? Aren’t you going to ask me how I am?”
A. “So how are you, Hymie?”
B. “Don’t ask.”
More Jewish Jokes
A new kinda chain letter: This chain letter was developed by virile men in order to make their sex life even more fantastic. As opposed to normal chain letters, this one costs nothing, and you Can only win. Green banana. (Many more at Rusty Brooks’s Joke mine). Also, On Thursday, May 10th, I installed a gigantic mountain of bananas- well over a ton of them - in the historic town square in Piotrkow Trybunalski in Poland…
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
A: 45 minutes.
More Sick Jokes from “Neon Bubble”. The following jokes are, at best, in less-than-savory taste and, in some instances, downright sick. However, if you're offended by offensive jokes you really, really, really shouldn't read any further
In-Progress Ideas for New Yorker Cartoons
Actual Medical Charts
The baby was delivered, the cord clamped and cut and handed to the pediatrician, who breathed and cried immediately. Exam of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized. The skin was moist and dry. Rectal exam revealed a normal size thyroid. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until 1989 when she got a divorce. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy. The patient lives at home with his mother, father, and pet turtle, who is presently enrolled in day care three times a week. Bleeding started in the rectal area and continued all the way to Los Angeles. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation. She is numb from her toes down. Exam of genitalia was completely negative except for the right foot. While in the emergency room, she was examined, X-rated and sent home. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However he took a job as a stockbroker instead. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches. Coming from Detroit, this man has no children. Examination reveals a well-developed male lying in bed with his family in no distress. Patient was alert and unresponsive. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room
I am on vacation and am possibly writing on my new Moving to New Zealand blog. This item had been pre-posted for your enjoyment. Many More Hilarious Jokes and other Funny Stuffs Here. I am not a serious person.
December 18, 2005 in Jokes | Permalink
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